If I never had to date again!

I am going to reminisce on some of my dates and write about them.  For some reason this one always comes to mind when I think of bad dates. I was newly single and had signed up for the OkCupid dating app.  I got bombarded as I am sure all half decent looking women do.  Well anyway, the one I decided to go on a date with was not from Utah and claimed himself to be a Southern boy. We messaged and text for a few weeks and talked on the phone.  We decided to meet at his place - only do this if you feel completely safe AND someone knows where you are going - and he was going to make his mama's fried chicken for dinner. So, I get all ready for my date and am super nervous.  Anyway, I get to his house and it doesn't smell like any fried chicken was being made, but instead it smelled like a freaking pet store. Yes, folks, a freaking pet store.  He had at least 20 aquariums stacked from floor to ceiling in his bedroom and "living" room. The place reeked! His reading...

I never thought that dating would suck as much as it does now, now that I am almost 40!! I never had an issue getting dates. Never.  I also enjoyed dates for the most part in my twenties.  The men were young, hot and willing to please!  Then I found someone I thought I could see myself married to forever.  We dated for a year, lived together for a year, married for three and now I've been divorced for 15 years! 15!! Sounds like I'd be super old using numbers like that.  Well FYI, I'm not 40..............yet! So, I got divorced.  Dated a few frogs in between and then decided to procreate with one of those frogs.  Thank God that my kids look like I had kids with a Prince.  I got very lucky there! I have been pretty much single for 6 years.  I have definitely dated some crazy, crazy boys in between there.  I have stories that most wouldn't believe.  I now understand why and how there came to be the crazy cat ladies! First of all,...